England.

Only in England:

• would high-profile members of the government and opposition parties be forced to resign from their positions because of a duck island and a moat;
• would one of the fastest-growing employment sectors be in government-funded Job Centres, helping the unemployed to find work. (The Russians used to hire men to put guns together, knowing full well that nine out of ten of the completed weapons would malfunction. Better to assemble broken guns than do nothing at all. Better to have a job telling others that there's no work, than not to work at all.)
• would many times more people cast their vote at the denouement of a television talent competition than will vote in the forthcoming elections;
• can we reduce politics itself to the aforementioned talent show. How many women has he slept with? Can he lie convincingly? What on earth is he thinking wearing such a disgustingly-coloured tie? Vote for the other guy.
• do we use cricket as a political weapon. That Mugabe had better stop killing rival politicians, or we'll bloody well not send a team to Bulawayo. That'll teach him!
• do we truly expect eviscerated political parties to disappear off the face of the planet. The few remaining MPs with core Labour values are huddling together in the cold, asking themselves if they'll ever come anywhere near forming a government again.
  
• are we able to turn atheism into a form of religious thought, complete with its own tenets.
• do we say 'only in England,' and believe that our biases and uncritical thinking divorces us from the rest of humanity.