Is the process of writing inevitably always one of compromise?
I ask myself this question in the light of a recent posting on here which irritated and upset L. I refuted her suggestion that one person could efface the loneliness of another with their mere presence, and L considered this to be a refutation of the relationship we have.
On the face of it, to write is to exist in a state of compromise between being able to say anything at all, and saying nothing whatsoever: a compromise between freedom and legislation (I cannot state that nogomet is a murderer, unless it is true, without expecting to be presenting him with a cheque for all the money I have.)
It is a compromise between truth and concealment (if L is not aware that I love her, then it is perhaps better to tell her first before writing about its consequences); a compromise between what I know and what I suspect; a compromise between conscious thoughts which I can detail at leisure, and the roiling undercurrent of unconscious ones which make the shadows of their presence felt; a compromise between creation and enumeration.
To write without compromise, without barriers, what would it entail? If we start with the emptiest phrase I can think of, the one used by children when they are learning so speak, it will hopefully be possible to build on that and make it speak the truth, force it to reflect the unconscious etc:
"The cat sat on the mat."
To negate compromise in the first instance, we can amend the above in order that it is libellous:
"The cat sat on the mat which the perfidious nogomet had earlier stolen."
What about revealing anything that may have been concealed? In doing so, we exacerbate the libel:
"The cat sat on the mat which the perfidious nogomet had earlier stolen. It was not out-of-character for him, for he had a criminal record as long as your arm."
And where are the elements of the unconscious? (Not being a psychoanalyst, I can only mimic this.)
"The cat, and the mat upon which it sat (which the perfidious
nogomet had earlier stolen - it wasn't out-of-character for him,
for he had a criminal record as long as your arm) were
representations of unfulfilled and latent sexual thoughts in
the mind of the dreaming nogomet. The intersection of cat and mat is the most depraved sexual fixation."
